Yesterday my dear wife received the following letter, from the local WalMart:Dear Mrs. Xxxxxx:Over the past six months, your husband has caused quite ... commotion, in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and have been forced to, ban both of you from the store.Our complaints against your husband, Mr. Xxxxxx, are listed below and are documented by our video surveillance cameras:1. March 15: He took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in other people’s carts when they weren’t. His heart was thumping at what had just happened. He went to bed without masturbating, as he usually did, and waited for the following night.Sure enough the site was there again at 8pm so he clicked on it again. It read, ‘welcome Dave, so you want to join sex club, stage one is strip club. If you come to strip club you must complete all five stages’. Then there was a pause, the screen went black and a message appeared. ‘Carlton Hotel, room 105, five minutes.He knew the Carlton, it was just. You're good with languages, so why not take a crash course in Korean—we'll try to find one in Atlanta, and I'll speak to you only in Korean too. I'll bet you can pick up a little by then." Well, okay, I suppose. I don't want to lose my advanced standing for college credit, though." Yeah, there's an attachment with the letter and looks like they've thought about that. It says we'd be taking classes that will be matched to our current high school programs so that we'd fit right in when we. Buses stop in bus stations. Trains stop in train stations. On my desk is a work station.11. I thought I wanted a career. Turns out I just wanted paychecks.12. In filling out an application, where it says, 'In case of emergency, notify:' I put 'DOCTOR."13. I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.14. Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.15. Behind every successful man is his woman..
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